Maximilian

"The greatest of excellence." Traditionally this name is spelled with two L's when it is a last name and one when it is a first. Of course his father did not know that when he sent out his "Introducing Maximillian" email, but everyone who knows his pops will understand. Kinda embarrassing not being able to spell your own child's name tho ;)

This name was one of only a few that stayed on the list for him. I think we tried well over a hundred different names. We would speak each one for a few days until one of us would look at the other and say "next". About a week before he was born we thought we liked Mximilian but were not positive. I decided it would work because a character in a book that was reading to Margaret as a bedtime story was named Maximillian (with two L's!) Wonder when we should let him know he was named after an unruly monkey ;)

Actually, to be completely honest, Margaret and I just like the way it sounds. In my dyslexic hysteria it almost sounds like he is the maximum million. Margaret thinks he sounds regal and the name rolls of your tongue. It was very important to her that he have a "normal" first name that everyone can pronounce.

Marley

Robert Nesta Marley (Bob Marley) - We toyed with Malcolm, Marcus and even Biko. It was very important for me that my son have a name that speaks to our hopes and dreams for him as well as place him in a historical context.

I thought Malcolm (Malcolm X) was a little too accessible. Most people who know me would just laugh that I chose to name my son after someone I think highly of but find fundamental faults in his philosophies. How could I name myself after someone who for most of his public life followed a religion I have serious issues with? Yes, he spoke of emancipation and liberation. And yes, he was eloquent and a great father. But in the end, he was a product of his times and was not able to break free of the enslavement of which he found himself. While I admire him greatly, I want my child to be in love with what the world has to offer and alter it by producing more love and understanding.

Marcus (Marcus Garvey) would be much closer since he actually thought of things for himself after traveling the world. If I follow any single philosophy in this world it would be his whole "self-sufficiency" thing. Never rely on others to do for you what you can do for yourself. The products the community uses should be produced by the community and within the community. Learn to limit your desires such that you do not become beholden to outside interests which you can not control. All of that is good. What is bad is his treatment of women and his MAJOR issues around color. If I met him on the street today he would treat me as poorly as members of the Nation of Islam did for many years. He would completely ignore Margaret. I can not honor someone like that by naming my child after him - no matter how much good he has given the world.

Biko (Steven Biko) lived and died in South Africa and has been an inspiration to me from the moment I heard about him. The few South Africans that I respect all hold him up as a true idol. "Ask all white people to leave the table so we Africans can decide what we want to do with our country. All the whites who stay are our enemies because they believe they have the right, against our will, to stay and tell us what to do. You will find that 'well meaning white liberals' are the ones who never leave the table." During my formative years his words spoke more truth than anyone else. It seemed as if poor people and people of color around there world were never able to make decisions on their own. There was always some wealthy European/American interest sitting at the table "helping" us. Biko also spoke of power and strength and his philosophies are the foundation to my preoccupation for who has control and the need for action. "The most potent weapon of the oppressor is the mind of the oppressed." If I had a son 10 years earlier I would have named him after this great leader.

It all came down to a single song the day after Max was born. His mother was in the shower for the first time and I fired up my "Dance" playlist on my iPod and started dancing and singing in the hospital. The song that came on was "Redemption Song".

All my conscious life I have used music to find my deepest spiritual awareness. George Clinton (PFunk) was an early inspiration (and I still go to his concerts). His idea was to make fun of the foolishness behind some of the things Black Americans do while celebrating the more positive aspects of humanness and especially "Blackness". Because I have always been an outsider in both my Black heritage and my white one, much of what Clinton sang about spoke deeply to me. "Free your mind and your ass will follow." I think I said that to Margaret within the first week of meeting her. Clinton speaks of throwing off the shackles on your mind and allowing your inner self to run free.

Bob speaks about the same thing - but made a life out of his desire to see justice and equality. "If you are going to win the revolution, you must win it with Rasta (God). If you win another way you must fight again. When Rasta win, there will be no more war." Bob Marley dedicated his life to peace and love. Yet he realized that the biggest war we must fight is the war within - the war of our minds and emotions. "Emancipate yourself from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds."

When I was singing and dancing around the room with Max in my arms I thought about mental slavery. Max is the product of two free minds. Margaret could have easily chosen to stay on Wall Street while I stayed on 6th Street. She could have chosen to marry within her Pa. Dutch culture and I could have stayed within my "Left Cost" multi-racial one. There are a million reasons we should not have come together and only one that we should - because we love each other. For us, love is enough. And God has graced us with a son because we followed our dreams. Bob Marley once said in an interview; "If you do not have dreams, how can your dreams come true?" Maximilian is a dream come true - the product of two lives lived to the fullest. What better way to honor him than to name him after someone as positive and world altering as Bob Marley?

"One love, one heart, let's get together and feel alright."

Ulan McKnight
September 10, 2002